Umwana ukivuka ni umuntu ukomeye ukwiye kwitabwaho uko bikwiye kugira ngo wubake umuntu mukuru muzima, kandi wubake ejo hazaza wifuza. Umwana muto ni we shingiro ry’ejo hazaza h’umuryango mwiza, Itorero rya Kristo  ryiza, igihugu cyiza n’isi nziza.

Kugira ngo ushobore kwita ku mwana muto, utaramenya kuvuga ururimi rwawe uvuga, bigusaba kumenya imiterere ye, ukamenya imvugo ye kugira ngo ushobore gusubiza ibyifuzo bye. Mu gutegura iyi nkuru twifashishije inararibonye dufite mu kwite ku bana bato, ibiganiro twagiranye n’abantu batandukanye, ndetse n’ibitekerezo by’abahanga ku mikurire y’umwana; cyane cyane abo ku rubuga rwagutse rwitwa “www.naîtreetgrandir.com”.

UBURYO WAMENYA IMITERERE Y’UMWANA

Inzira nziza yo kumenya umwana ukivuka kugeza igihe azamenyera kuvuga  ni ukumarana na we umwanya munini. Icyo gihe, uzavumbura imiterere ye, urwego rwe rwo kumva igihe hari ikimukozeho, uburyo yumva urusaku n’ibimukikije bigaragara. Buri mwana wese aba yihariye uko umwe ameze si ko undi aba ameze. Kumenya ko buri mwana yihariye bizakurinda guhohotera umwana ukeka ko ameze nk’undi mwana uzi, bityo bigatuma usubiza nabi ibyo agusaba cg se rimwe na rimwe ntubisubize. Gusa, n’ubwo bimeze bityo, hari ibyo abana bose bahuriraho birimo: “gukundwa, kugaburirwa, guhumurizwa, gusinzira, kwidagadura no gutuza”.  Nufata igihe cyo kubana n’umwana, buhoro buhoro uzamenya icyo akunda, icyo yanga, ikimubabaza n’ikimubangamira.

NI GUTE WAGERAGEZA GUSOBANUKIRWA UMWANA?

Nubwo aba atarashobora kuvuga neza nk’uko nawe uvuga, umwana agerageza kumenyekanisha ibyo akeneye, kandi agaragaza amarangamutima ye akoresheje ibimenyetso umubyeyi we cg se umurera agomba kwiga no kumenya, kugira ngo abashe kubisubiza neza.

Nyuma yo kuvuka (kuva mu nda y’umubyeyi), kurira ni bwo buryo bwonyine umwana akoresha bwo kwerekana ko afite ikibazo.

Urugero: afite inzara, kumva atamerewe neza, kuba ashaka guterurwa, afite ubwoba, kurambirwa, n’ibindi...!

Gusa, iyo ubana n’umwana cyane wumva ko arira mu buryo butandukanye, uko arira ashonje bitandukanye n’uko arira ashaka gusinzira; ibyo byose na byo bitandukana n’uko arira iyo yanduje ibyo wamwambitse, ...! Abahanga bagaragaza ko, buhoro buhoro, uko agenda akura, umwana atangira guhindura imvugo bitewe n’icyo ashaka kuvuga, Urugero nko gusakuza, kumwenyura, igihe yishimye, kuvuga mu ijwi rinini igihe arakaye cg se atishimye, gukoresha indoro akakureba bitandukanye bitewe n’icyo ashaka kuvuga, gukoresha ibimenyetso by’amaboko, n’ibindi!

Mu kwitegereza uko ababyeyi be n'abamukikije bamwitwaraho, umwana amenya uko abona ibyo akeneye, akamenya n’icyo akora kugira ngo abone icyo akeneye. Igihe cyose agaragaje ko akeneye ikintu runaka maze umuntu wizewe agasubiza icyifuzo cye mu buryo buhagije cg se bumunyuze ibyo bimuremamo kwigirira icyizere kandi bikamutera imbaraga zo gukomeza kuvumbura ibintu bitandukanye.

WASUBIZA NEZA GUTE IBYIFUZO BY’UMWANA WAWE MUTO?

Iyo umwana wawe agaragaje ko akeneye ikintu runaka, ni ngombwa ko amenya ko hari umuntu uhari wo kumwitaho usubiza ibyifuzo bye. Iyo ugerageje kumufasha gutuza wumva ibyo akubwira, ubasha gusobanukirwa neza ibyo akeneye n’ibimenyetso bibiherekeza.  Nyuma y’igihe uzasobanukirwa ibyo akora ushobore kubihuza n’ibyo akeneye. Urugero : gushyira igipfunsi ku munwa igihe ashonje, gushyira urutoki mu kanwa ashaka gusinzira, n’ibindi.

Ibyo ukwiye kwitondera mu kwita ku mwana muto:

-          Kwita ku mwana igihe cyose  abikeneye no kumuterura igihe abishaka ntabwo ari ukumutetesha cyane nk’uko abenshi babivuga, ahubwo bimuremamo kwigirira icyizere kuko abona ko akenera ibiri ngombwa, kandi bikazamugira umuntu muzima wita ku byo abandi bakeneye. Ikindi ni uko bituma mumenyana kurushaho, bikongera kandi bigakomeza ubumwe hagati yawe na we.

-          Kuko kenshi abana basaba ikintu bakoresheje kurira si byiza ko umwana arira ngo umwihorere uvuga ngo arageraho aceceke (ahore)! Ni byiza ko umubyeyi cyangwa umurezi w’umwana  agerageza kumwumva agashaka neza icyo amubwira, kuko hari igihe aba asaba ikintu cyoroshye, kitagoye kandi cyatuma amererwa neza.

Urugero: ushobora kuba umuhetse akarira kuko urutoki rwe rwihinnye nabi akaba arimo kubabara; akarira agusaba ko urambura neza urwo rutoki rwe gusa. Ashobora kurira kuko hari ikintu kiri ku mwenda wambaye cg se ku byo umuhetsemo, ku byo umutwayemo kirimo kumubabaza, akarira agusaba ko ukigizayo gusa, Ashobora kurira kuko yananiwe kuryamira ahantu hamwe akaba ashaka ko umuhindukiza kuko we atabishoboye, ...!

Igihe cyose weretse  umwana ubugwaneza kandi ugasubiza neza ibyo akeneye bituma ubumwe hagati yawe na we bukomera. Uko ubwo bumwe bukomera hagati yawe n’umwana bizabafasha mu gukura kwe, akwiyumvemo, akugirire icyizere. Ibyo si umubyeyi cyangwa umurezi w’umwana bizagirira umumaro,  ahubwo bizatuma umwana yigirira ikizere, mu mikurire ye, ndetse binamufashe mu mibanire ye n’abandi mu buzima bwe bw’ejo hazaza.

UKO WAGERAGEZA  GUSOBANUKIRWA ICYO UMWANA AKUBWIYE

Umwana ashobora kugusekera igihe nawe umusekeye cg se igihe umuteruye mu maboko yawe. Ariko kandi ushobora kumusekera akareba hirya cg se wamuterura ukabona nta cyo bimubwiye, rimwe na rimwe bikakubabaza kuko asa nk’ukwigizayo. Nyamara, hari igihe aba ari kukubwira ko yananiwe, cg se ko uri gusakuza cyane agira ngo ugabanye ijwi uvuge buhoro muganire mu ijwi rituje.

Mu mibanire n’umwana muto, ugenda ugerageza gukora ibyo utekereza ko ari kukubwira udacitse intege ukageraho umenya icyo aba arimo kuvuga. Ugomba guhora witaye ku mwana urera kugira ngo umenye impinduka zimubaho mu kugaragaza ibyo akeneye, kuko uko agenda akura ashobora guhindura uburyo bwe bwo kuvuga cg se uburyo avugamo kimwe akaba ari nabwo akoresha avuga ikindi. Ntabwo ugomba guhora ugendera ku byo wamenyereye ko avuga gusa.

Urugero: ushobora kuba uzi ko arira saa moya z’umugoroba kuko aba ashaka gusinzira. Ariko ashobora kugira umunsi mubi ukamunaniza akarira saa kumi n’imwe z’umugoroba ashaka gusinzira. Icyo gihe, iyo ukomeje kubyitiranya n’ibyo umenyereye uramuhohotera.

Ushobora kuba uzi ko akuba mu maso iyo ashaka gusinzira, none ubu akaba arimo gukuba amaso yayarwaye ashaka kukubwira ko ari kumurya wowe ukajya kumuryamisha, …!

UKO WAGANIRA N’UMWANA UTARAMENYA URURIMI UVUGA

Igihe cyose uri kumwe n’umwana hari ibyo umukorera cg se umuganiriza ntibisobanura ko byose agomba guhora abyishimiye, hari igihe abangamirwa kandi ibyo ugomba kubifata nk’ibisanzwe. Kugira ngo mugirane ibihe byiza n’umwana kandi mubyishimire bisaba ko hagati yawe na we haba ubumwe bwuzuye, ukamenya neza ibyo akeneye mu gihe cyabyo.

Ibihe byiza ugirana n’umwana ntabwo bigomba kuba ari ikintu ukora ku isaha runaka, ahubwo bigomba kuba muri buri kanya kose ubonye ko kugira icyo umukorera.

Ni byiza kuganira n’umwana kandi ukamubwira  buri gihe cyose icyo ugiye kumukorera, bituma abona ko umuha agaciro. Ushobora kumuganiriza igihe uri kumukarabya, umubwira ibice by’umubiri we, igihe uri kumwambika umusobanurira ibyo uri gukora,  ushobora kumuririmbira  cyangwa kumubwira inkuru ishimishije! Ugomba kandi kubwira umwana igihe cyose ko ari mwiza, ko umwishimira, ko umukunda, n’ibindi byiza binejeje!

Ikindi dukwiye kumenya ni uko igihe umwana yatangiye gukoresha ibikinisho bidasimbura kuganirizwa n’uwo bari kumwe. Jya ufata igihe cyo gukina n’umwana kuko byongera ubumwe hagati yawe na we kandi bikamufasha gukura neza. Ni byiza kuganiriza umwana no gukina na we igihe nta rusaku ruhari (hatuje).

WABIGENZA UTE IGIHE UFITE AKAZI KENSHI N’UMWANA WO KWITAHO?

Hari igihe uba ufite byinshi byo gukora kandi ufite n’umwana wo kwitaho, ni byiza kumugenera umwanya ukwiye kandi uhagije. Kugira ngo ubigereho igihe uri wenyine udafite ugufasha ugomba:

-          Kurara uteguye gahunda y’ibyo ugomba gukora byose, hanyuma

ukabigenera umwanya utari bukubangamire kandi ngo ubangamire umwana.

-          Igihe udafite umwanya ariko ukaba uri kumwe n’uwo mwashakanye, ugomba kurara uteguye gahunda y’umunsi uzakurikiraho, mukagabana imirimo ku buryo umwana azabona umwitaho mu gihe muzaba muri muri iyo mirimo.

-          Mugomba gukora ku buryo buri wese muri mwe afata umwanya wo kwita ku mwana.

-          Igihe bidashoboka ushobora gusaba ubufasha mu bavandimwe, mu nshuti, mu baturanyi, ...!

-          Mu gihe uri gukora gahunda y’akazi ugomba kureba ibyihutirwa akaba ari byo ukora.

-           Ugomba kandi kumenya ko hari ibyo ushobora kureka gukora mu rugo kandi mu buzima busanzwe ari ibintu bikenewe, ukabyirengagiza kugira ngo wite ku mwana.

Mu gusoza, tubashimiye igihe mwaduhaye cyo kwigana namwe kandi tubararikie kuzakomezanya natwe mu masomo azakurikiraho. Dukomeje kandi kubakangurira kwita ku bana, kubaha igihe gihagije, uburere bwiza n’urukundo, kuko ari byo bizatuma tugira isi nziza muri iki gihe no mu bihe bizaza. Kugira isi nziza n’umuryango utwizihiye bibe ishema rya buri wese.

Umwanditsi:  Mme Pelagie NAHAYO